When Not to Say No

You've probably heard about "yes" people; otherwise known as people who can't say, "no." No matter what the question they say, "yes" even if they have no idea what they are saying "yes" to. These are the people who find themselves burnt out because they are spread too thin and don't have ANY time for themselves to do the stuff they truly want to do. They are the ones who complain that they wish they could paint because they love it or go to the beach to watch the sunset or just cuddle up with a good book.

I've been thinking about this and what I call "overcommitment syndrome." This happens when we have trouble being honest when someone either asks us to do something, to be somewhere or to commit to giving up OUR time. Sure, we all want to make people happy & it can be hard to say, "I really appreciate it but this is not a good time or I'm not available. Thank you so much for thinking of me." Is that really so hard to say? Apparently, it is for many people. We have all been there. 

Saying no in this scenario will free you up to do the things you want. Explore what you really want and block or save your time for activities that fill you with joy. Doesn't that sound great?

I am a busy parent and some days l am just tired and can't wait to sit down & relax. Can you relate? However, I recently remembered that my kids and my family are my whole reason for being. They truly are why I do what I do. So I can spend more time with them. Did I forget? No, not really and at the same time I was too busy saying, "Yes," to too many things that didn't serve me.

I took a step back and paused, and I have made a conscious decision to be present in the current moment and give my undivided attention & time to them. I have stopped saying no, just a minute, later or not right now to our children. Read that again - it's important. And THEY are the most important gift in my world right now.

When they ask if I want to go for a bike ride, make a miniature backpack for Barbie or to read, I am saying, "YES!" I don't care what I'm doing or how I'm feeling. I am going to smile, tell them what a great idea, get on my bike even though I could probably use a nap and appreciate these special times.

Soon they will be on their own, and I do not want to look back and ask myself where the time went. I want to say, "Wasn't it cool that we did so many amazing things together?" Even if it was only when we were laying on the living room floor building legos. Because the present moment really is the best moment. BE PRESENT!